Living Unapologetically "Wasteful," Unbound by the Obsession to "Make the Most of Things"
🔧 Choosing a Lifestyle That Prioritizes Continuity Over Efficiency
A while ago, I wrote about how starting "morning practice" made me reconsider what's truly important in life.
https://knowledgeaccumulation.substack.com/p/chords-of-change-finding-harmony
This experience has brought about quite a few changes in my way of living and values. Recently, I had another similar realization that has allowed me to "enjoy" something more, so I'd like to write about that.
The period when you enjoy something more as you improve
The recent change I'm talking about is related to the exercise I do about once a week for my health.
As someone who rarely goes out, I tried to find a way to exercise at least once a week and in December 2021, I started going to the pool to swim.
This suited me quite well, and in 2022, I went to the pool a total of 55 times. With 52 weeks in a year and a goal of going about once a week, I exceeded my target, achieving a very impressive record. (Usually, there are holidays like Obon and New Year's when I tend to skip, so just going once a week normally wouldn't be enough to meet the goal.)
During this time, I enjoyed the process of trial and error, figuring out how to swim longer and more easily. I even made an "Obsidian note about front crawl" for this purpose, and was swimming in a very wholesome way.
Falling into a slump and losing motivation
However, after I started a new hobby, "guitar," in May 2023, the frequency of my pool visits gradually decreased. In 2023, I only went to the pool a total of 38 times. I went twice in September, but zero times in October, and only once each in November and December. In the four months from September to December, I only "exercised" a mere 4 times.
Having reached a level where I could swim to some extent, my growth slowed and I started to get bored. I found practicing guitar more enjoyable than going to the pool to swim. There were various other factors, but in summary, I simply started to feel that "the pool wasn't very fun" anymore.
The importance of enjoying without overdoing it
That said, just walking occasionally is definitely not enough exercise and unhealthy, so I should do some proper exercise. But I didn't really feel like putting too much effort into the pool, and weight training is tough in its own way, so I'd rather go to the pool than do that. As I pondered this, I suddenly realized something.
Am I not imposing strange constraints on myself and making going to the pool boring on my own accord?
Is the reason I haven't been enjoying the pool lately because it's "strict"? Am I just setting strict rules for myself and deciding that I've had a "good workout" by achieving them? And if I can't clear those goals, do I feel like it's "not enough"?
Have I started to feel that I can only consider it "exercise" if I come up with a "tough practice" like I did when I was in a sports club, and then clear those "goals"?
I was setting goals like "swim 15 laps without rest today" or "add one more lap next time," and thinking of "going to the pool" as a set with achieving those goals, but I'm the one setting those goals myself.
However, when I really think about it, my purpose isn't to go to the pool and achieve a quota. The purpose is to maintain a healthy and sound body and mind in the long term through moderate exercise.
If imposing "strict practice" makes me not want to go, then it's better to think "it's okay to be more casual" and just swim casually and come back home. Rather than doing strenuous exercise reluctantly while feeling like you don't want to, isn't it better to get even a little bit of exercise in a somewhat enjoyable and casual way?
Breaking free from the "mottainai disease"
I suspect that one of the reasons I end up thinking this way is related to a kind of "mottainai disease" (wastefulness disease) that I have.
I've always had this feeling that "since I paid money to go to the pool, it would be a waste not to make the most of the facility to get my money's worth," and I can't help but think about how to effectively utilize whatever is in front of me. This feeling might be making me want to do "strict practice" even more.
I thought that this "mottainai disease" way of thinking itself might be having a negative impact in the long term, so I decided to "not try too hard" and just go to the pool casually, swim casually, and come back home.
As for the results, even just swimming casually makes me feel really good. In the past, I used to push myself to swim 500m to 1000m consecutively, but I don't do that anymore. I swim 50m, take a break, swim 50m, take a break and walk. I do that 2-3 times total and that's it. And that's perfectly fine.
Even swimming like this without overdoing it and coming back home, I feel a good sense of fatigue from "having exercised" both on that day and the next day, and I feel sufficiently satisfied.
Just moving my body to this extent makes me feel good the next day and onwards, allowing me to spend the day in a good mood.
Wait, this is all positive with no downsides. I don't suffer while swimming, and I can still savor the satisfaction of having exercised enough. I talk about making effective use of the pool fees, but it's only 300 yen per visit in the first place. Thinking that I have to use that effectively is more of a waste.
The mottainai disease can definitely have good effects if used well, but that feeling must be utilized to guide myself in a better direction more skillfully.
That's what I realized.
Enjoyment is the purpose of life
In the end, this story is the same as the "morning practice" one, where I found myself imposing constraints on myself and trying to make my own life dull without realizing it.
To some extent, it's part of my nature and I have no choice but to accept it and deal with it well, but the important thing is to be able to utilize it skillfully while being aware of it.
And this time too, I think I was able to realize this because I have "others," my family, around me.
My wife and son don't have any kind of stingy mindset like I do, and they can act quite naturally with "enjoyment" as their top priority. Seeing that allows me to feel that "that way is better."
Whether it's work, hobbies, or anything in life, relying solely on Spartan methods makes it difficult to form long-term habits.
It's good to "work hard" at practicing guitar too, but I need to be mindful of striking the right balance.